Oh my

Oh my, where have I been? Been busy doing normal everyday things I guess! Ryan has been home from school all week, he's had a fever and a really nasty cold. Now, he was nice enough to share it with me, so I had a not so great night. Anyway, my friend Amy was writing about Middle School memories, and then her Dad posted a lot of memories. I have some really bad home type memories from MS. My Dad was a truck driver, He had worked for a company that ended up going bankrupt, so he had to find different jobs. Well there aren't that many truck driving jobs where your home every night like the one he had. Anyway, he ended up working for some companies where he would be gone for 2-3 weeks at a time, home for a little while and then gone again. ( He owned his own truck at this time , very expensive to maintain.) So then he finally got a good job for a VERY reputable company, called TNT Holland Motor Express, now known as USF Holland. He drove a company truck, so most of his paycheck didn't have to go for truck parts and repairs. That was nice. The down side he was still gone pretty much all week, he would occasionally be home during the week, he'd get home in the morning and leave around supper time. This was really hard on me. I had a really close relationship with my Dad, my Mom was NOT my favorite person, nor was I hers. I can remember being able to go to school all upset about somthing that happened at home with my Mom, and having a teacher I could really talk to. I felt like there was nobody else. Anyway, Amys' dad mentioned a MS teacher he worked with was Becky Thomas and that's what sparked all these memories, she was the teacher I could really talk to, she made my MS experience not so horrible. More on my Dad, speaking of memories. I could talk to my Dad about anything, he was my favorite person in the world! He passed away in 1997, Bradley was not yet 2. My boys really got the raw end of the deal with the loss of my Dad. He was so excited that I had a boy, he would be so thrilled about my having 2 boys. I'm sure he's watching over them. Before my Dad died, I gave him a card, inside the care, I wrote a bunch of thank yous' inside, like thank you for just being you, Thank you for the talks we used to have, just between you and me. There was a whole list. My mom had to read the card to him, while I sat in the kitchen and cried. Mom said she saw tears run down my dads face after she read the card. Thinking about that still makes tears run down my cheeks. I miss him so much. As did my Mom. When he died, part of her died with him. As I got older and had kids of my own, Mom and I got much closer. When we both had computers we would talk on instant messenger all the time. I would also talk with her by phone at least once a day and I saw her all the time. Both of my boys adored her, as she adored them. My mom passed away 3 years ago on Feburary 9th. So this time of year seems to make me weepy. The odd thing, Amy brought home her son Tru, the same time my Mom died. Her happiest day, was my saddest. My mom still bugged me sometimes. But she was my Mom and I loved her no matter what. My kids were also ripped off by not having her around either. Now all my boys have is my in-laws, not that they are terrible people, but my Mother-in-law seems to bad mouth me and everything I do to my kids. She tries to teach them old wives tales and of course the kids seem to belive everything she says, so I have to re-explain things. I remember one time, before I had kids, she told me my Sister in law would rather pick up a book to read to the kids than pick up a broom... What is wrong with that? I'd have to agree with my SIL. My house is never spotless, it looks lived in, because it is. And I will stop cleaning somthing when one of my kids asks me to read a book, or go outside and swim with them, they are only with me for a limited time, why waste a minute of it. My house can be spotless and remain so, from the time the kids are off to college, start thier own lives until I have grandchildren to come over and mess it up. Until then, it will remain to look lived in... am I wrong? My mom agreed with me. She was even nice enough to clean my house for me when I was pregnant with Ryan, because I was so sick. I guess that's enough of a trip down memory lane, I sort of wandered off in many directions. I could really use my Mom today, I could be napping since I don't feel good, and she could be hanging out with Ryan ( who will finally go back to school tomorrow!!). Which reminds me, she even picked up Bradley for me a couple times when I was pregnant, because I was too sick to function. Doug even left work once to come home and take care of me and Bradley. I really miss my Mom and Dad....